Almost Left Everyone Then

Poncho:

It was about 10 years ago. I was a young child who was enjoying one of the endless days of summer. I was laying on my belly on an burlap sack. It would have been the third time that I went down that old wooden slide on my stomach. This slide was a monster, probably about 100 years old and two stories high. I heard my mother yelling that it was time to go. I saw my little cousin, who was 5, sliding down ahead of me. I wanted to catch up to her. I wanted to speed down the slide faster that any of us did that day.

I did just that. I speed down the slide as if I was a piece of ice rolling across a frozen pond. With all the excitement, I almost did not realize what happened. I do remember how it felt though when it went through me. I reminded me of that time I step on that nail. It felt exactly the same. The pain did not compare to the shock. Who would of thought that a 9 inch long splinter would have pierced through my skin into my insides.

I think back to that moment in my life ever now and then. What if I did not change my mind at the last second? What if I went down on my stomach like I was going to? That splinter would of pierced my heart, one of my lungs or my stomach. I could have died.

It is weird how one innocent decision was important enough to determine if I lived or died. I was not faced with a decision of life or death, I was just choosing how I should slide down this slide. It was so much more fun on my stomach. Why did I not go down the slide that way, especially since it was my last chance to do so. It is weird. I just instantly turned around and sat on the burlap sack as if it was second nature to me. I can’t explain why I did that. I was already on my stomach ready to slide down. I mean just why or what made me not slide down on my stomach.

Can you imagine?, losing everything at such a young age. Everything that has happened to me since then, was a split second decision from not of happening at all. The people who have laughed with me, loved me, cheered for me, thanked me, appreciated me, and were happy because of me would of never even known me. It is just odd to think about…

-Dave

We are destined to die.

Poncho:

I have done everything that is expected of me. I have not given anything nothing less than 100 percent. I try to be the best at everything I am involved in. I bust my ass to make everyone else happy. No matter what I do, my life seems less and less important everyday. Why am I really here? Why are you really here? Does anything I do really help answer this question?

I look back on everything that has happen in my past. I look forward to what lies ahead. All I see is death. It is hard to keep going when eventually all that you do will only lead you to your death. I could die tomorrow, you could die tomorrow or either of us could die 50 years from now. If you think about it, does it really matter. Think back to when you were 5. At that time you had some much ahead of you, know look how much time has past. How long has it really been. Soon you will be in the last years of your live. How long is a year compared to eternity?

We are only around for a short time. I will never be satisfied with anything in the world. The same holds true for all of us. You might think you are happy but in actuallity you are never happy or completely satisfied. I know I am never satisfied. Maybe that is why nothing seems as great to me as it does to everyone else. Think of your life. Think of what you have done. Think of what you could have done. Think of what you would have done different. Think of what it would of been like to be someone else.

We are involved in a complex world of many people. Most of us will come and go to never of really existed. If no one remembers us than how can we have exist? Just don't worry so much about being your best especially if you don't think it will earn your place in history.

-Evad